Saturday, February 28, 2009 :)
Hello. It's been a while. Don't bother reading this post cos it's quite an emo post. I just need an outlet.
The past few days of my life have been like crap. Putting up a front that I'm happy (as I always am) although inside's a mess. I'm not surprised though. A lot of things affecting me and everything's going downhill.
Why this is happening? Well, I feel that the one I loved the most, whom I worked so hard to please; whom I thought loved me and cared about me more than anyone in the world, abandoned me. Abandoned me when I needed him the most, when I tried so hard and didn't have the strength to persevere. A few months of asking him for help, and he never did help. Even though I tried. He encouraged me, gave me hope that things would get better. And every time I thought it was getting better, BAM, it all fell apart again. I still trusted him, up till the point that disappointment overwhelmed me and I could no longer find in him any comfort or help.
So in case you're wondering how I'm doing, I've given up on him, and I've given up on myself. I've lost the will to fight, to try, to do my best. Where once there was hope, there's now disappointment.
But I'm gonna try one more time. Just once. Because you care. I'm gonna try one last time. Not for him, but for you.
What, ho, what, ho, what, ho!10:08:00 pm
